Throughout most of my life, I've surrounded myself with children. For the first, let's say 10 years of my life, I was a child. So it was super easy then. And from what I remember, I was a pretty awesome child. I ran around barefooted, climbed trees, saved stray dogs, and always washed my dirty feet in the bathroom sink before dinnertime.
I began babysitting in middle school, volunteered at my church's nursery, and mentored kids throughout college. I love me some kids. Kids are generally nonjudgemental, silly, and not as awkward as adults. Kids make my experience worth while so far.
How can anyone say no to a face like this? One of my favorite neighbor kids.
It took me a long time to build up the courage to simply walk to the primary school (which is only about 150 meters from my house) and talk to the teachers there. But once the courage was full strength, I had a really confusing conversation with the teachers in mostly Khmer and a little English and accomplished nothing. This was back in December and I ended the conversation stating that I could start something at the school in January. In the end, no one was really sure what that "something" would be...well, actually, the teachers expected that the "something" would be teaching English and I thought it would be teaching health lessons. I returned a couple weeks later with my Khmer tutor and the expectations for me did not change much. We did, however, figure out that I'd come to the school on Mondays, Tuesdays, and Wednesdays at 10AM. I would teach whatever I wanted in the library for grades 4, 5, and 6.
Finally, after some pussyfooting around, I went to the school to teach the kids about the three food groups. In Cambodia, there are three food groups promoted by the Ministry of Health - Grow, Go, & Glow! I think it's a great campaign. Grow - or "ahaa satabana reeang kai" represents the body building foods. The meats (and other weird things that contain protein - tarantulas, crickets, silkworms, eels, etc.) Go - or "ahaa tomapol" represents the carbs/fats/energy foods. So rice, corn, oils, fats, sugars, potatoes, etc. And then there's my favorite, Glow - or "ahaa gah-peer reeang kai" which represents the body protecting foods with lots of vitamins and minerals, i.e. fruits and veggies. I'm a veggie pusher. Generally, I'm unsuccessful at convincing kids of the wonders and deliciousness of veggies but I guess I don't blame them. It's kind of a written code that all children abide by - "Vegetables are our evil bitter enemy." But it doesn't hurt to try. My new tactic is to tell kids that if they eat vegetables they will be beautiful like me. I know, it's terrible but I'm on a mission to get all the kids in my village glowing! Vegetables are very delicious. Bonlai ch'nang na!
After the first lesson on the food group Grow, everyone learned to draw a fish!
I made it through the food groups and felt pretty good about myself. I had actually prepared (a little) and pulled off three days of health related material. This is my job! Hooray! And then, I started going to the school with nothing prepared. This was both fun and terrible all at the same time. The kids discovered that I can draw and they now demand me to draw monkeys, fruit, elephants, etc, ALL THE TIME.
I drew this monkey at the HC from memory! I know, be amazed.
I drew the line on drawing requests when my health center staff asked me to draw their kids MORE monkeys. No, it's time for your children to learn to draw their own damn monkeys (is what I said in my head.) If Peace Corps encourages anything, it's capacity building. It is completely unsustainable for me to make drawings for everyone in the village. I will teach them to draw and build on the capacity of the people! My heart has already been broken too many times by the words "Khnom aut jeh goo" spilling from a child's lips. It means "I don't know how to draw." And if there's anything a kid should know, it should be to draw (at least in my book.)
Something I learned the hard way is that kids in primary school = chaos (as the title of this post so suggests.) It boggles my mind, the difference between kids in primary school and the kids in secondary school. Or perhaps what boggles my mind the most is the tolerance for chaos displayed by the Khmer teachers.
Let me explain. One day I went to the school, excited to hand out nice white pieces of paper to the kids and have them draw their homes. I wanted them to draw their own houses because the day before they asked me to draw my house in America. There were, suspiciously, many more students than usual in the library - some very small. I suspected that there was more than just 4th, 5th, and 6th grade students stuffed into the already stuffed library. There was no where for the little little ones to sit. I was sweating.
I began passing out the pristine white paper only to realize I definitely did not bring enough for everyone. Grabby (and grubby) hands were surrounding me, kids were begging me for paper, and when I ran out I felt so bad. Why did I even do that? Again, giving the kids paper is not sustainable. I don't have endless funds to provide them with clean white paper every time I meet with them. And when I'm gone, no one will give them paper to draw on. To make the situation even worse, without thinking about what could come of it, I brought out my colored pencils and crayons. I did this because I wanted to do something nice for the kids. I wanted them to make beautiful drawings. But instead of joy and beauty, the library turned into MAYHEM. I don't think I've ever been so shocked by the actions kids. The moment I removed the colored pencils from my bag all chaos erupted. Kids were rioting, falling over each other, trampling the smaller and weaker kids to get their hands on the colors! It felt like an eternity; I was stuck in a tornado of whirling hands and screams. And as the chaos unfolded I looked to the back of the room toward the three khmer teachers sitting and watching the chaos - completely unfazed. What is going on?
I was upset. I told the kids to stop and sit down. I took the coloring pencils away. I told them what happened was not good and that no one could use the colors because of what happened. I felt bad for causing such a craze. It really showed me how seldom the kids receive new school materials and how much they lack in their lives but which I constantly had at my fingertips as a child. I had endless art supplies as a child and took it for granted. It's no wonder I learned how to draw and it's no wonder how so many kids in Cambodia say they don't know how to draw.
The chaos of the day simmered and the kids that didn't have white paper were okay with drawing in their notebooks. Some kids copied my drawing of my house which I drew on the white board and it was even prettier than mine! They were so excited to show me their drawings. The lesson ended on a good note but I will never forget the day that I feared what 40 small children were capable of.
They look more innocent than they really are...........don't be fooled
The next day I went to the primary school turned out to not be an official school day. Most of the kids were already home but the kids that were there dragged me around the school grounds, threw flowers at my face, and shared star fruit with me.
It was nearing lunchtime when I decided to stop drawing elephants and go home. I walked hand in hand with a few kids when suddenly behind me I heard someone crying. I turned to see who was crying and why. It was a young boy, maybe about 8 years old, and it was unusual for a boy of that age to be crying. I was worried. He was standing in the doorway of the classroom with another girl that was equally as worried as myself. It took me a while to realize that the boys eyebrow was cut. It began bleeding pretty badly and was dripping into his eye. I wasn't really sure how he cut his eye, but I surmised that the door was shut on his face. And the girl standing next to him was the one who accidentally shut the door on him because she did not see him.
I got a napkin from a woman selling fruit nearby and wiped the blood away from his eye. We then walked our way across the campus - the boy, myself, and 20 other kids, to the health center. I held the boy close to me and repeated "aut baanyaha" to him which means "not a problem." I didn't want him to worry. I just wanted to scoop the boy up in my arms and run to the health center but it was hot and I didn't want to freak him out any more. I looked closely at his eye once me and my gang of kids made it to the HC. I was hoping he wouldn't need stitches but the nurse looked at it and decided it was a stitch-able cut. I was hoping no more than 4 stitches based on the size of the cut. Luckily, the boy's mom was informed immediately and she made her way to the HC as soon as possible. The nurse had him lay down on the bench and they prepared him for stitches. At that point, the girl that was involved in the accident was crying and all the other kids were crowding around to watch. I told them it was time to go home and that they should not watch. Some kids left with me but a few stayed because Khmer people love to watch disturbing things sometimes. I wanted to stay with him but decided it was better to get the other kids home and have less gawkers at the HC.
And so the stitches concluded my week of chaos with the children.
This experience only reinforces my theory that there is no "happy medium" in Cambodia. I'm either bored to tears and taking too many naps or running on stress induced adrenaline. The moments and amount of stressful events are extremely minimal in comparison to the massive amounts of boredom I endure at times which almost makes the stressful events a gift. I would never wish stitches upon anyone but having been involved in two stitching incidents within one month is maybe a little bit odd. Either way, I'm still hanging out with the kids 3 days a week, sometimes more.
Ain't nothin' gonna break my stride. (Nothing is better than this music video right here right now click this link seriously please do it.)
And here's a kiddie with a kitty! The kitty's dead now.
Kitten play
great post. i can feel/remember what cambodia is like through the incredible spikes in boredom and stress you write about. and of course, dead puppies and kittens in the hands of young children.
ReplyDeletehey girl, thanks for reading. For it was one of your blog posts that began my girl crush on you. I believe you made up a Liz Lemon quote. And it was legit. I like you.
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