BOOK REPORT #2

Dudes,

Do you ever get introduced to a book, read the first page, and thereupon tear through the pages like it's a bar of fancy chocolate? (mmmmmm...fancy chocolate...)

I've been on a nonfiction kick for the last couple of weeks. For some reason, the idea of reading about fictional characters right now is a big turn off for me. I've got enough stuff going on in my life and rattling around in my head right now that's stranger than fiction. Why should I invest more precious brain juices on those characters? Why not suck up some real earth knowledges? Yes.....earthly earth knowledge sounds delicious right about now.

So anyway, back to the books. I had a makeshift two-person book club going for a month or so, which has since dismantled (story of my life right now. Everything's falling apart!!!! Me, dramatic?) For our second book in our book club, I chose the The Omnivore's Dilemma by Michael Pollan. He writes primarily about food (which (reading about food) can be detrimental to the mental health of any Peace Corps Volunteer, by the way.) Another book of his that I read years ago was The Botany of Desire, in which he explores the beneficial relationship (co-dependent?) between humans and four specific plants: apples, tulips, marijuana, and potatoes.

You like food? READ THIS!


What I loved about The Omnivore's Dilemma was Pollan's personal experience throughout his journey into the world of different food industries and food-life philosophies. The first part goes into the dark, dingy depths of the corn industry of America. Man, I love corn. But in a very different way than you'd expect. The only way I really like to eat corn is raw (DON'T KNOCK IT TILL YOU TRY IT!) But what I really REALLY love about corn is it's history in America and how it grows. I had a cornucopia of corn knowledge prior to reading this book due to one of my favorite people in the Universe, Jeffry Nistler.

This is Jeff rocking not one but TWO man-purses (the top one MIGHT be a camera bag...)


Jeff is, among many other talents, a farmer and I was lucky enough to work for him for 8 years (hopefully he'll take me back when I'm an unemployed returned peace corps volunteer.) I was a farm hand; especially skilled at hoeing and transplanting melons. Jeff's specialty is sweet corn in the summertime, pumpkins and squash (among other curious gourds) in the fall-time, trees in the wintertime, and exploring Peru in the dead of wintertime. He also builds bikes!

Not sure who is enlightening who here: Jeff on the left. That other guy with the cane is awesome.


And so it was Jeff who instilled me with a great many nuggets of corn facts. This is why I am now proud to call myself a corn snob. But the corn that Jeff grows is different than the corn Pollan highlights in the first part of his book. He attempts to follow corn from a farm in Iowa to one of the many places it could be taken throughout America - from feedlots (or CAFOs: Concentrated Animal Feeding Operations) in Kansas all the way to a McDonald's in Marin County California. Basically, this corn that Pollan is talking about is feeding most Americans unknowingly. Example: a McDonald's chicken nugget (mmmmmm chicken nuggets) has 38 ingredients, 13 of which are differently processed versions of corn. (mmmmmmmm...?)

After he tears the industrialized food industry a new one, he moves on to the "ORGANIC" food industry. And this part just makes me giddy because organic food truly is an industry which is completely contradictory of what the Organic food people are constantly preaching. I understand what organic food is attempting to say and do but how they end up doing it is not by definition organic. There are just TOO many people in America trying to be organic at the same time. So get off your high horse. You're not better than everyone else if you eat organic sausages or granola cereal. And then there's thing thing called "Beyond Organic" which is really what Organic wishes it could be. Just read the damn book and you'll know what I'm talking about.

The last meal Pollan explores is that of a hunter-gatherer which was by far my favorite of his adventures. He killed a wild boar in California which was one of his first experiences hunting. He went morel mushroom hunting with a bunch of weird dudes in a forest. He usufruct some cherries to make a dessert. Can I go back to America and live as a hunter-gatherer? Do I know anyone that knows how to identify mushrooms? If so, please speak up! Teach me your ways.

If you care at all about what you eat (where it comes from and how it is what it is) you should read The Omnivore's Dilemma. But don't take my word for it!!! #READING RAINBOW.

QUIET: Hard thing to come by in Cambodia.


On to the next one, on the the next one: before I let my mind slip into complete malaise, I zapped my next book into motion on my fancy little nook e-reader thingy (thanks mom and dad.) Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain (my new best friend.) My friend and old co-worker Elliott (Read about him here!) gave me his copy when he finished it last year but I didn't have enough time to read it before flying away on an aeroplane to Cambodia. So I downloaded a copy from the mighty interwebs (completely legally; bought and paid for.)

"Restorative Niche": my bedroom in a South Minneapolis basement.


I couldn't put this book down and the best part was, I didn't want to leave my room or my other secret reading nook while reading it. I needed to be alone! I was learning about myself and needed to pay close attention. If you've been an avid "Laurax Doodles in Khmer" reader then you'd know that I've struggled a bit with the "Who Am I?" question, feel guilt-ridden when I hermit myself too much, and feel too much pressure in the spotlight at times. In certain chapters I felt like I was reading about myself!

The book is about 300 pages and I highlighted it 92 different times (awesome feature of the nook)! Here are some highlighted highlights:

• "cross the street to avoid making aimless chitchat with random acquaintances"
• "many introverts are prone from earliest childhood to strong guilt feelings; we also know that we all tend to project our own reactions on to others" (whoa...)
• "people who tend to [suppress their negative emotions] regularly, might start to see the world in a more negative light." (ruh-roh!)
• "self-monitors are highly skilled at modifying their behavior to the social demands of a situation." (hello, pseudo-extrovert Laurax.)
• "taking shelter in bathrooms is a surprisingly common phenomenon, as you probably know if you're an introvert." (I love bathroom hideaways. Stalls are a great place to cry.)
• "we can stretch our personalities, but only up to a point."
• "introverts often feel as if they express themselves better in writing that in conversation." (blogging!)

This book helped me realize that I am not totally whacked out. That maybe the things I do are more normal than I thought they were. It also made me realize why I oftentimes feel completely overwhelmed in my village. Like I've said before, PCVs are "on duty" the moment they walk out of their bedroom and that can be draining when it's every single day, especially for someone with introverted tendencies. There aren't many "restorative niches" or quiet places to re-energize. I think, with confirmation from this book, there are many people that struggle to understand who they truly are. We try to put ourselves in to boxes; extrovert-introvert, outgoing-reserved, etc etc, but we don't have to be one or the other and we really can't be. It's just not possible. I've spent a lot of my life trying to be what people want me to be. One thing that makes me happier than anything is to make other people happy; but my misstep here was not taking care of myself first. I didn't recognize when I needed to disappear and find my "restorative niche" so I too could be happy.

One of my "Restorative Niches": My desk back home. Cluttered and yet so peaceful. Look! I'm on Facebook. Lolz.


You don't have to be introverted to read Quiet. If anything, it just makes you think about what makes you happiest and how knowing that can lead you to a life where you are truer to yourself. Or as Shakespeare once said (according to the book) "To thine own self be true."

Another "Restorative Niche": solo walks in Minneapolis


My current mission(book): Packing for Mars: The Curious Science of Life in the Void by Mary Roach. This lady is HI-Larious. Laughing out loud over here. I also read Stiff: The Curious Lives of Human Cadavers by Mary Roach. I want to be this lady's friend also.

Packing for Mars: puking in zero-gravity and shit. Good stuff.


Read on, friends. READ. To infinity and beyond.

laurax doodles medical-type-practices-things in khmer

Sometimes I forget that the title of my blog is "Laurax Doodles in Khmer" (I just put a link to my blog on my blog.) And it's been over a month since I've written a blog post. It's not that I haven't had material to write about. I have bountiful amounts of material that I could share with the world but I've had a lot on my mind lately. So much so that I've been overwhelmed with where to begin with it all. Also, I finished reading the book "Freedom: A Novel" by Jonathan Franzen. That book took a lot out of me. It was so good but it wasn't an easy read. My brain is now more jam packed with highly severe political and environmental information and opinions because of that book. Also, I'm quietly keeping up with politics in Cambodia (There's a super duper important election in July) and that alone could cause cardiac arrest for me. HOWEVER, due to my position as a Peace Corps volunteer, I am not allowed to dispense my opinions (especially via the World Wide Web) about the country's politics. It's for the best.

And so, I will share with you, some of my recent apolitical artworkings:

How to treat a wound.



I was channeling Angelina Jolie for this one. She's checking her carotid pulse




Measuring a pregnant belly - ANC Check-ups!




Do you recognize infection when you see it?




how to care for a nosebleed. Usually there is tissue or gauze also involved...


This is the cover art for the training manual "Chewy Pong" which means "Help!" The manual was made by a number of PCVs from all around Cambodia and it's pretty cool. I was experimenting with color in this one. I'm not sure if I like the color choices yet. I need to take my color design class with Wendell again. (Can you see the stained glass? If you can't, that's too bad. Inspired by my mamma!)

What do you think of the colors? I don't know...


And I've been motivated to start making my own drawings just for the heck of it. I got in the mood to do a vintage circus theme...

Gypsy lady, I'm kinda in love with you.



I'm going to go and play hopscotch now.

Don't think too much

"Don't think too much" or in Khmer "Kom cut ch'ran" is something my host mom said to me this past week. This is advice I need to keep in my mind at all times. And of course, not think beyond the advice because that would be thinking too much. It's as simple as it comes. Don't think too much. And yet, I am frequently cursed with the dreaded thought circles that I create without much supporting evidence for or against whatever those thoughts may be.

I'm paranoid that people don't like me. I think it's maybe...sort of...a little bit normal for a foreigner living in a foreign world to never really know how people think of them. Culture is different, social cues are different, communication is completely different. So for me, it's easy to start questioning how genuine the relationships I've created really truly are.

I'm definitely an American when it comes to socializing (is it American? I forgot already.) To me, eye contact is the most important social interaction tool. It's important to make eye contact with everyone involved in the conversation, to assure that everyone involved feels included. For most of my child-like adulthood, I have taken it somewhat (and quietly) personal when a person does not make specific eye contact with me. I'm so paranoid at times, that I make a point to observe this particular person's eye contact patterns. I ask myself "who are they making eye contact with?" "why aren't they making eye contact with me?" "do they not like me?" "why don't they like me?" And once I pick up on my paranoid observations (delusions), I begin to believe them simply because I think I have excellent skills in reading other people's body language.

This is a very unproductive and damaging way to think. I realize that. BUT I CAN'T STOP IT!

I've unfortunately taken this evil paranoid habit along with me to Cambodia. And you know what? It was a really really bad idea. I could have packed another shirt or perhaps a better bra but no. I just brought my terrible habit and fear that someone won't or doesn't like me.

I don't know about you guys but these eyes (are cryin')...read to me as straight up fear


As I was saying, eye contact is a very Western social tool. Not so much in South East Asia. In some places, particularly in Cambodia, making eye contact with another person can be seen as offensive or possibly rude. This is not a rule by any means, but it does exist especially between opposite sexes. It can be an especially big no-no for a woman to make eye contact (especially especially prolonged eye contact) with a man. Although Cambodia is progressing as a nation and is beginning to treat men and women more equally, eye contact however, is still not a big part of socialization for Cambodians.

While my paranoia about eye contact was a little much in America, in Cambodia it is absurd, obsolete, ridiculous! And yet, I still use it because I thought it was so handy back in the US of A. But what I'm learning now is that it wasn't handy anywhere, ever.

It is detrimental to my relationship building and I can see now that I'm only hurting myself. It is hard to live in a foreign country. It is REALLY hard to live in a household in a foreign country. I don't speak the language very well and I don't have amazing Khmer body language reading skills. I can't always tell when a person here is having a bad day or just wants to keep to themselves. Therefore I can't take it personally if I don't get the smile I was hoping for or the right amount of eye contact when someone is talking to me.

I'm learning that the kind of socializing that is most important in Cambodia is simply being present with one another, sharing meals together, and spending time with one another. I need to stop obsessing over everyone's micro-expressions and just be happy where I am. Because how many times do you see an elephant walking down your street in America?

I chased this elephant down with my ice coffee and camera in hand.


Also, if you're at all interested in reading a cool book about faces, micro-expressions, and the history of the face - I totally recommend reading the book "The Face: A Natural History" by Daniel McNeill. It's an awesome interesting book that I will probably read again.


Hearts & Farts

Laurax

Book Report

By: Laura Olson


Something I learned early on; Time moves slowly in Cambodia. During training, time moved slowly but I was so busy that I didn't have time to realize it...odd, I know. Training was long; at times pretty boring and other times challenging, stressful, and all-in-all, draining. There wasn't a lot of room for philosophical, deep, intellectual thought. I'm also not much of a future thinker. I'm more of a "it's so damn hot and I'm sweating" in-the-moment thinker. Therefore, I was ill-prepared for the reality of my actual service which coincided with a complete lack of pre-arranged structure.

I remember explaining the benefits of the Peace Corps experience to friends and family before I left and "structure" was one of the words I used. I always wanted to travel and experience different ways of living but couldn't just get up and leave the way some wanderers and explorers do. I'm surprisingly too responsible and not surprisingly too obsessed with saving money to just get up and go. Peace Corps would provide me with the structure and new cultural experience that I was too scared to set off for on my own.

And here I am! I'm finally serving in the Peace Corps and have zero structure!!!! Woo-hooo!! Oh, this world is just so funny sometimes. The world of Cambodia is especially funny.

Henceforth! I read books to pass the time. Here we go with the main subject of this blog post! Onward soldiers march! I'm a slow reader and I'm not like every other PCV with a fancy touchscreen book face reader thing. I got me some real live books! They're made of paper and smell delicious. So far, almost every book I've read since in Cambodia, I've been able to relate to my life in one way or another. Is this something everyone does? Probably, but my experience is COMPLETELY UNIQUE compared to everyone else's so I'm special. Just kidding. What am I talking about?? Focus Laurax.

Book #1: Naked in Dangerous Places: The Chronicles of a Hungry, Scared, Lost, Homesick, but Otherwise Perfectly Happy Traveler

By Cash Peters (in my head I keep thinking his name is Cash Powers...)

Don't worry, I'm only getting naked in appropriate and safe places


This book was a gift from my dear friend Geneva before I left Minnesota. It was a perfect gift (given my history with Geneva) because it was in the perspective of a person, Peters, that was not much of a traveler but was hired to be in a reality TV show about traveling to obscure and exotic lands.

I read it so slowly, especially in comparison to other PCTs, so slow that I hadn't even finished it yet and another person finished their 12 book since training started. Holy geez, what's wrong with my brain? It's hard to stuff a lot of things in there all at once.
Either way, I enjoyed reading this book during my first month of training and introduction to Cambodia. There was a chapter dedicated to Peters' short stay in the Kingdom of Wonder and I knew he was talking about Cambodia before he even mentioned his location. Within the first couple of sentences he mentioned something about monks and how it's not even 7AM and it's hot as balls. Or something like that. I'm paraphrasing.

When reading this book, I was very fresh to Cambodia as was Peters' and I was able to laugh out loud in agreement with his initial feelings and reflections of his visit.


So that turned out to be the only book I brought with me to Cambodia other than my travel book and Birds of Southeast Asia book (which I love!!!! Thank you, Auntie Barb!)

So now what? Luckily, my friend Amanda let me borrow her Kindle for a little while and I went for a classic Book #2: "Fahrenheit 451" by Ray Bradbury.
This book let me escape the world around me when I was tired and sweaty. I had very little emotional attachment to the book (perhaps because I was reading it with a Kindle...?) however it did make me yearn to read more books. It felt extremely strange reading a book about a society that burned all of it's books to keep from polluting their minds ON AN ELECTRONIC READER! It didn't feel right. But it kept me distracted.


I lucked out during my one day vacation to Phnom Penh before moving out to permanent site. There are kids in the tourist area of PP that sell books for cheap. The quality is not always that great because they're photocopied versions of the originals and then bound with a cover. I bought two books for $8 (I'm sure I coulda bought them for cheaper but I liked the kid selling them. He was really great to talk to.) The first book I chose was a no-brainer.

Book #3: Lucky Child: A Daughter of Cambodia Reunites with the Sister She Left Behind

By: Loung Ung


The second book by Loung Ung; highly recommended by yours truly


I was extremely happy to acquire this book since I read Ung's first book, First They Killed My Father: A Daughter of Cambodia Remembers before I left the states. I left the book with my parents hoping that maybe one of them would read it (AHEM, Mom. Maybe she did?)
Ung recalls her dark childhood under control of the Khmer Rouge in "First They Killed My Father" and I was captivated by her story. One of the most challenging things for me was retelling the story to my friends and family back home. I wanted them to know about her experience as well as the millions of others that suffered during the Khmer Rouge genocide but it's not something many people want to sit and talk about while drinking coffee and eating brunch.

Once in Cambodia, I found other PCVs that either read the book or wanted to read the book for obvious reasons. Cambodia was making great progress as a nation before the Khmer Rouge trampled on all the efforts made by its people in 1975. It makes me wonder how necessary Peace Corps Volunteers would be had it never happened.

I read Ung's second book, Lucky Child, during my first couple of weeks at permanent site and was probably one of the best books for me to read given my situation. Ung is the "lucky child" as she was chosen to follow her eldest brother to America after they sought refuge in Thailand. All the while, much of Ung's family including her older sister, Chou, remain in Cambodia. Her family in Cambodia continue to endure attacks from the Khmer Rouge soldiers as well as struggle everyday to find enough food to survive.

Ung's new life in America is not comparable to that of her family's suffering in Cambodia however she experiences many personal and emotional challenges that are not apparent to the naked eye and possibly harder for others to understand. Ung is in a new foreign land where she doesn't speak a word of the language and completely depends on her brother and his wife for everything. She eventually begins school but is behind because of her lack of English skills and finds it difficult to integrate for more reasons than just the difficult language.

I was able to relate to Ung's difficulties with finding a place in the United States because I was going through very similar challenges here in Cambodia. How can anyone make real friends and real connections with a new community when everything is foreign and strange? Ung became the token Asian girl at times and I find myself being the token "barang" or foreigner to so many people in my community. Because I am! I look really weird! I have whitish skin, blondish hair, and a big nose! I get that but I yearn for the words to explain to others who I am beyond "I'm Laura, I'm from America, I'm 26 years old, I have one brother, I'm not married yet, I'm a volunteer, I'm not a doctor, I'll live here for two years."


Time heals all wounds. In time, I will grasp the language and hold deeper conversations with my family, friends, and co-workers. While this is still very raw and bpi-baak (difficult) now, I keep telling myself that in one year, I will barely even remember how challenging life is right now. Or I'll look back and laugh at how ridiculous it all was. And even better yet, this isn't even as difficult as it will get! Hooray!

In conclusion, this post took me about a week to finally shell out because it was basically homework. See title (Book Report.) I have more books to review and blabber on about and how I can relate so well to the characters, fictional or not. Books are good! Books are fun! Books are pretty! On to the next one, on to the next one.

And to end this blog post even more narcissistically, here's the most recent photo of myself. Please note that I accidentally cut my bangs. I like them! Sorta! Mostly! Don't worry, I'm still growing my hair out. Never give up! Also, other than the constant compliments about my beautiful skin color, I also get constant compliments about my nose. Now, this is funny to me because I've never been a huge fan of my nose and it's right out there in the open for everyone to see! Either way, the compliments about my nice nose are frequent and coincidently, two babies that are currently cooking here will come out with my nose! My host sister is pregnant and said at dinner last night that she wants her baby to have my nose. One of the nurses at the Health Center is also pregnant and she stated something similar a few weeks ago. So there you have it folks: my nose, my book report, my life. I hope I didn't bore you too much. This was really difficult to write!


OOOooh hair and nose.


I'm out!